Something that might frustrate you as a caregiver could be that you’re angry now more than you ever used to be. Anger is an emotion that everyone experiences, but there are appropriate times to experience it and ways to express it.
The Situations Around You Aren’t about You
Lots of times anger shows up because you’re frustrated and haven’t been able to manage that feeling or because someone else is exhibiting angry feelings and they’re taking it out on you. If your senior is having anger management issues, that is going to wear on you. The thing is, that anger isn’t usually about you. It might be directed at you, but it’s really about her situation and about the fact that she feels safe expressing those feelings in your presence. If you can remember that, you might be able to avoid getting drawn into those feelings yourself
Anger Is Normal and Valid, but Sometimes it Gets in the Way
You absolutely can and should feel angry when the situation calls for that response. There are plenty of times as your elderly family member’s advocate that something or someone is going to need to see that you’re angered by a situation. But how you express that anger matters. Yelling and screaming comes across more as a tantrum than an expression of genuine anger. Anger can be motivational and it can help you to get things done, but not if you’re experiencing it all the time.
You Have to Take Care of Yourself Properly
If you’re not focusing on taking care of yourself, you’re going to have a more difficult time with anger and when it’s appropriate. Self-care helps you to be able to center yourself and to be able to step back from some situations when you need to do so. When you ignore your own needs, it’s difficult for you to avoid getting sucked into every situation and you’re more likely to take other people’s words and actions much more personally.
Respite Time Can Be the Right Answer
One of the first and best steps in beginning your self-care routine and learning to harness your anger for appropriate times is to take time away. Respite time can give you the chance you need to catch your breath, both emotionally and literally. Leaving your senior with home care providers ensures she’s cared for and that you can focus on you for a little while.
It’s not about stopping yourself from feeling anger while you’re taking care of your senior. The real issue is how you deal with your anger and what you do to make sure that when you do express anger, it’s because the situation warrants that expression.
If you or an aging loved one are considering hiring professional Caregiver Services in Bernardsville NJ, please talk to the caring staff at Generations Home Health Care today. Providing Home Care in Somerset, Essex, Union, Morris and Hunterdon Counties. Call us today at (908) 290-0691 or (973) 241-4534.
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